Nice Skirt, Dobe
by Queen Sunshadow
Summary: Uhoh. Kohona's laundry is completely messed up, so everyone has another ninja's laundry. Now Naruto's stuck wearing a girl's clothes or else he goes naked. That in itself spells trouble, and a perverted encounter between two rivals? [Oneshot][SasuNaru]


**Summary:** Uh oh. Kohona's laundry is completely messed up, so everyone has another ninja's laundry. Now Naruto's stuck wearing a certain girl's clothes or else he has to go naked. … That in itself spells trouble and... a perverted encounter between two rivals? Oneshot SasuNaru

**Disclaimer:** Naruto and Company do not belong to me.

**Rating:** PG-13

**Warnings:** Yaoi-ness… Mm. Nothing too bad. Kisses? Groping? Mhm?

**Pairings:** SasuNaru

**Note:** This is meant to be a humorous portrayal of.. my imagination. XD

AND SO COMMENCES MY FIRST ONE-SHOT EVEEERR.

Oh, and if the laundry messing up part doesn't make sense, please don't bother me about it. Personally I really don't care if it doesn't. :D

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**Nice Skirt, Dobe**

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It was a little known fact that every ninja in Kohona went to the same laundry mat every Sunday to put their clothes into the washing machine, and then they all returned at five o'clock PM (exactly on the dot mind you) to switch their recently clean garments into the dryers. This Sunday was no different, except for the fact that Uzumaki Naruto was going to the laundry mat with his rival (and team mate), Uchiha Sasuke.

Why was that different you may wonder?

Well, for starters, lately the two had been arguing more and more, and it was harder for them to be around one another without … ripping each other's heads off. So to see them waltzing into the building together and not trying to kill one another was quite a rare sight. No one knew why they were so argumentative lately, but they figured it had something to do with the fact that Naruto had spit in the Uchiha's food, and then…

Let's just say once Sasuke left the bathroom, he was pretty damn pissed at a certain blonde.

Ever since that faithful day, they had been on one another, trying to beat each other with every spar they took place in. Well that was what all their friends thought was the reason for the behavior. But they didn't know _why_ Naruto had spit a giant loogey into Sasuke's bowl of noodles.

That reason is disclosed information as of now, but the blonde considered it a good enough reason to get revenge.

Ahem. Continuing with the story, the raven and the fair haired boy were currently glaring at one another while they shoved their dirty laundry into the washing machines. And then they stormed out, and went separate ways, letting their clothes wash.

While that happened, the rest of the ninjas inhabiting Kohona entered the infamous laundry mat, getting their own garments cleaned. And then.. disaster struck. The majority of the laundry was already done and sitting in baskets along side the washing machines, waiting for their owners to come and put them in the dryers. But, one of the washing machines (the one holding Naruto's clothes ironically enough) was still running (the imbecile had set the timer for too long) and began to smoke and rumble in a way that could not be considered normal.

The owner of the laundry mat frantically tried to shut off the machine, but it was too late, and the whole thing blew open, spewing out the most disgusting brown goo, and lord knows what else, which covered _all_ of the recently cleaned laundry.

"Oh no! They'll all be coming in twenty minutes! We must clean these before they arrive!" The staff of the laundry mat frantically threw random articles of clothing into the washing machines (not even caring if they matched the same basket or not), and put them on high.

Twenty minutes later, the recleaned laundry sat in baskets, looking like it had never been tampered with. Little did the unsuspecting ninjas know… Their laundry had been completely mixed up, and none of them had their own clothes. (Well maybe they had a mere sock… But nothing more!)

And so the laundry was then placed into separate machines to be dried, where it would be picked up at seven PM on the dot.

* * *

A blonde haired, blue eyed, tanned boy stepped out of the shower with a satisfied sound, shaking excess water from his head. He looked in the mirror and winked at himself before stepping out into his bed room with only a towel wrapped around his waist.

He had been too tired to check if his laundry was in order (yes he picked it up at seven, but he had been training most of the day and wanted sleep), so when he reached into the pillow case that served as a laundry bag, and pulled out a violet skirt, he was, completely and utterly shocked.

"What the hell?!" First off, the skirt must've shrunk in the wash, because it was damn _tiny_! Who the hell could _wear_ this without looking like a slut? Oh.. Right. Ino. So, somehow Ino's dumb, skimpy skirt had gotten into his clothing pile. No big deal, right? There _had_ to be at least one familiar orange jumpsuit in the bag!

So Naruto dug a tan hand into the bag and fished out… An equally shrunken shirt. What. The. Fuck. Frantically now, the blonde rummaged through the pillow case, and found nothing but _purple_ skirts, _purple_ shirts, and oh my… _purple_, lacey underwear.

It hurt him on the inside. Especially since he had to _wear_ this crap.

"Aha!" No, no he didn't! He had his laundry from yesterday! The blue eyed boy eagerly raced over to where he had thrown his clothes last night, and found… a note?

'_Dobe-_

_I figured I owed you after you nearly killed me with your own bodily fluids. Next time keep your saliva where it belongs. In your goddamn mouth. _

_P.S. That jumpsuit of yours made great kindling for my bonfire. Maybe I can borrow another?_'

"Goddammit Sasuke-bastard! Gaaarrragh! I hope you die of smoke inhalation!" Naruto fumed angrily, before tearing up the mocking note, and chucking it in the trashcan (which was already overflowing with empty ramen cups), and stomped over to his pillow case.

"Oh.. This is so wrong on so many levels. I'm gonna look like a drag queen!" The blonde grimaced, but dropped his towel and went to work, first pulling on the.. ew.. lacey panties.

_Riippp._ Obviously Ino was skinnier. Well, he could still wear them, right? After all, they were only ripped a bit in the back. No big deal. Naruto wished that he actually _wore_ something to bed, like boxers, then he wouldn't have to wear the goddamn underwear too.

But no, he had to sleep in the nude.

The tight fitting underwear was on, and now.. the shrunken skirt. Naruto grabbed it and stared, wishing it was about two sizes large, and two feet longer. But there were no shooting stars around, so he was stuck pulling on the mini skirt, and barely breathing.

"Wow.. I look pretty damn good.." He checked himself out in the mirror, a smug look on his face as his eyes traced how the skirt hugged his hips and showed off his nice legs. Damn he was sexy-

"Oh god! I'm turning into Ino!"

* * *

Uchiha Sasuke was pissed off. Which was saying something, since he had been in a good mood the first thing in the morning after watching Naruto's hideous orange jumpsuit go up in flames. Now he was looking at the _same goddamn ugly jumpsuit_, which was _mocking him_ and trying to burn his eyes out at the same time.

Somehow, his laundry had turned into the blonde dobe's, and no matter how hard he searched, he couldn't find _any_ amount of clothing that belonged to him. Life. Was. Horrible. And. Punishing. Him.

"Well, at least I have some more things to stoke the fire with." Sasuke mused darkly, before grabbing yesterday's clothes from the floor and pulling them on.

* * *

'_Where's the dobe? I want to train dammit…'_ Black eyes surveyed their surroundings, looking for Naruto who was late. Kakashi had sent Sakura to try to find his laundry, leaving Sasuke to train with the Uzumaki. Too bad for him though, since Naruto was no where to be found.

"Ugh.. It's so hard to walk in this thing!" The Uchiha turned his head to catch soft grumbling, and then Naruto stepped into the clearing, dressed… Oh my…

The blonde noticed Sasuke's stare, and flushed, instinctively covering his crotch, "Stop staring you pervert! I don't have any clothes to wear except for these!" Even though he hadn't wanted to, Naruto finally decided to put on the shirt as well, so he looked exactly like a really slutty cross dresser would. And the worse part was, he looked fucking _hot_.

"So you got Ino's laundry, hm?" Sasuke forced himself to tear his eyes away from the dobe's muscular looking legs, and meet his embarrassed blue eyes.

"Uh.. Yeah… Was your laundry messed up?! How come you're wearing your clothes?" Naruto demanded, moving his hands away and crossing his arms, giving Sasuke a nice view of his crotch, which had some very tight material stretched over it. Sasuke found himself vaguely wondering what the dobe would look like from behind…

"Because unlike you idiot, _I_ had clothes from yesterday I could wear." The raven replied with a smirk, knowing full well that Naruto was going to explode at this comment.

"I _would've_ had clothes too, if you hadn't fucking _burnt_ them!" The other growled, eyes narrowed in rage at his team mate.

"Hn."

"What..?"

"Well I was wondering how you planned on training in a skirt."

Naruto's mouth formed into an 'O' as he realized what Sasuke was saying. Of course he couldn't train in a goddamn skirt! For one thing, it was way too tight, so it could rip almost instantly if he did anything even remotely simple. Such as kicking, for example.

"I can't train today. Nope. No way." The blonde began to shake his head defiantly, scowling at Sasuke who had a large smirk on his face. It was a good thing Naruto's embarrassment was distracting, otherwise the raven would still be letting his hungry eyes rake over that delicious looking body.. Look at those legs… And that tight ass probably looked even better-

Ah Jesus! Sasuke angrily fumed in his mind, as he body began to betray him, his pants tightening forebodingly. Naruto failed to notice the other's discomfort, prattling on about 'stupid girls' and how mini skirts were 'made by the devil.' If that were the case, then Sasuke found that he was very fond of Hell at the moment.

"Ahem… Dobe?"

"Eh? What do you want now Sasuke-bastard?" Naruto grumbled, unconsciously tugging the skirt down.

"What are you wearing under that?" The Uzumaki began to sputter incoherently, his blue eyes wide as he now frantically pulled the skirt down his thighs, exposing more of his tanned six pack.

"N-none of your goddamn business teme!" He managed to force out, cheeks burning bright red. At the same time, Sasuke felt a devilish plan morph into his head, one that would let him find out exactly what was under that skirt…

"Hn. Whatever. Let's train dobe." Sasuke tugged out a few daggers, smirking slightly as Naruto's eyes widened further.

"Sasuke-bastard, no-!" The daggers soared towards him, and in a desperate attempt to flee Naruto bent backwards, so he was basically making a bridge with his body. This gave the pervy Uchiha a rather generous view of Naruto's new, purple, lacey undergarments, which he personally found suited the blonde well.

"Nice underwear dobe. But, one question. Doesn't the lace give you a rash?" Sasuke's snide, mocking voice was enough to make Naruto go mad, but he couldn't do much, collapsing onto the forest floor and laying with his legs spread apart (well, as far as they could go, considering the tightness of his skirt).

"It itches like fuck, and- Hey! You… You p-pervert! You looked up my skirt!" Naruto sat up on his elbows, using one arm to point accusingly at the Uchiha who had his eyes still locked on the underwear, as if hypnotized.

"You really shouldn't lie like that… Sometimes.. people… can't … control themselves…" Sasuke murmured huskily, walking very slowly towards the Uzumaki, until he was close enough to crawl, and then straddled the small boy's waist. The blonde gaped up at his rival, who was looking at him with half lidded eyes, full of… Oh god…

"Get off of me bastard!" He squeaked, unused to having Sasuke's face in such close proximity. It reminded him of their first (and _last_) kiss, but this time, it was _Sasuke_ drawing closer to him. And this time it wasn't going to be an accident.

"Can't.. too… hot…" Naruto had no time to reply, having his lips captured in a searing kiss, one that made his head spin and his heart pound. A tongue pushed past his partially open lips, and tangled with his own, causing a low moan to rise in the back of his throat. Since when was a kiss so _wrong _supposed to feel so damn _good_?

For a while the blonde was lost in a pleasure filled haze, until.. some hands that didn't belong to him began to ghost over his sides, and then behind his back to grab-

"Eep! Sasuke!" Naruto gasped loudly as his ass was squeezed roughly, and a low, hungry chuckle greeted his squawk, followed by another grope. And then the blonde's lips were occupied once more, and all that was heard was the sweet, wet smack of lips against one another and soft moans.

"Sasuke-kun! Naruto! We're back! It turns out Iruka-sensei had Kakashi-sensei's laundry! Isn't that funny? Though it is weird how some of Kakashi-sensei's boxers were in his bed…" Sakura's loud voice was fast approaching, so Sasuke, while furious on the inside, tenderly kissed Naruto's lips before bringing his own next to the blonde's ear.

"By the way, nice skirt, Dobe."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Wow this was a lot of fun. I started it a few weeks ago and never finished it. Then I randomly had the urge to do so, and HERE IT IS. XD I like it alot. I hope you do too. And yes, I know it's random and that Kohona probably doesn't even _have_ or _know_ what a laundry mat is. Don't tell me something I already know, **_please_**. 


End file.
